Leaving your parents’ home and renting a place of your own is one of those milestones that sounds more exciting when you’re still at home.
You imagine the freedom. No one asking where you’re going. No one complaining about your room. You can eat whatever you want, sleep whenever you want and make your own decisions.
Then the rent is due and there is electricity. Food. Water. Transport. Cleaning supplies. Internet. Unexpected expenses that somehow appear at the exact moment your account balance starts looking suspicious.
Moving out comes with freedom, but it also comes with a crash course in adulthood.
We sat down with five young Nigerians to find out what life has been like since leaving their parents’ homes.
Joshua, 27
It’s crazy and fun at the same time. The freedom is nice, but then you realise that you are now fully responsible for yourself.Bills, food, house rent, making decisions for yourself, it all becomes your responsibility but I’m actually enjoying the experience because I’m learning to be more independent and responsible.
Imade, 28
Well, it’s tough, but I’m surviving. You’re spending money every day, but if I go back home, I lose my freedom. So I have to choose between spending the money and having my freedom. It’s a difficult decision, apparently, but one that comes with its own answer.
Victoria, 23
I’ll say it’s been a ride. One skill I’ve developed is learning how to bargain in the market. When you leave your parents’ house, you’ll learn how to price things in the market, or else they’ll cheat you. I’ve also become more frugal with money. I ask the important questions before purchasing anything.
Osato, 24
Well, it’s been a ride. I’ll say the only thing I miss is when I’m sick and my mother is not there by my side to cater for me. It’s painful because now I have to fend for myself. I have to get up, get drugs and cook. Moving out may mean gaining independence, but it also means discovering that sometimes, what you really want is your mother’s food and someone asking, “Have you taken your medicine?”
Although their experiences are quite different, there is one thing all five seem to have in common:
The debit alerts never stop coming.
There is always something to pay for. Rent. Food. Electricity. Transport. That unexpected expense that appears just when you thought your account was finally looking healthy but somewhere along the way, you also learn to bargain, make smarter decisions and handle things without waiting for someone to come and sort them out for you.
Maybe that is what moving out really gives you. Not a perfect life, and certainly not a cheaper one, but a life that is yours.
You are making your own decisions, solving your own problems and slowly becoming the grown-ass adult you once couldn’t wait to be and sometimes, after spending all day proving that you can do everything yourself, you might still want a plate of your mother’s rice and stew.
That’s normal too.
So, share with us: How has your experience been since leaving your parents’ home?
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